She continues to play the role all along her life....!

There are times when my mom tells me "Why don't you leave your son with us for sometime,we will look after him for a while and you can do things that may revive you"! I smile and say " Yeah,will do it sometime".But I wonder if I will be ever able to let him go away from me(in any context) and if that could revive me in any sense!I remember the day when he was in NICU(neonatal ICU- ICU for new borns) due to jaundice.I couldn't wait to see him.

That reminds me of an episode of a mother who hadn't seen her newborn from the day she was born for 20 days!Yes,there was a lady who gave birth to a baby girl before the gestation was over (around 7 months) which was underweight and had some health issues.She(baby) didn't cry soon after she was taken out from the womb(and apparently it's a problem).The baby was in the ICU under photo therapy kind of stuff and could not be removed even for nursing.So the mother had to use a pump to express her milk into a bottle every time for 20days without even seeing the baby as nobody is allowed inside that environment where babies are kept except the staff.There's no hell which could be as torturous as this one.

Whenever we crossed path to nurse the babies or express milk,we could see her sitting in one corner and expressing the milk looking into a null zone.I once saw that woman's father who was in tears talking about her and how painful it was to her that she would beg her father to get the baby and take the two home.Being a new mother I could know how she felt(of course it could be 1000 times more than what I could understand).

One fine day(I guess it was the day I was getting discharged and they were going to give my son to me - forever) when I walked in,I saw her sitting in a corner not doing anything,she was kneading her palms,rubbing her forehead and looked very restless.In a while,one of the staff member came to her with a tiny thing wrapped in a soft white cloth and we knew it was her baby.It was the first time she was going to hold her.They placed the baby on her chest making the baby feel the contact with the mother's skin and she was told this would be done everyday from then on for 10 mins (but nursing was still not allowed). The baby was too small,probably half of my son's body length.I was very happy to see the mother,her face was wet and brightly lit up,she didn't know what to do.She hugged her little one as she sat there looking somewhere in the space trying to digest the fact that she was feeling her daughter.

Baby looked little discomforted,it was equally struggling and was making feeble sounds but wasn't crying.I slowly shifted my focus to mother where I could see the baby's pain in her eyes and tears rolling down on her cheeks.Yes,it's true that the moment baby is born the mother is also born and she continues to play the role all along her life....!