It was one of those days that will never repeat itself ever again, it was the day I met the God ,Almighty. I entered the elevator and when it shut down I realized He was there with me. I was excited (naturally) and didn't know what to say but manage to blabber a lot of things.
I : " Oh my God, it's you "
He: " Yes, it is me , milady"
I : " Oh God, there are a lot of things I want to ask you but I'm still looking for words. I'm tongue tied. Oh wait, is that you ?"
He: " No milady, you are actually tongue tied, I'm not doing anything of that sort. But if you want to ask something, take a number and wait in the line."
I : " Oh c'mon, you can't possibly say that".
He: " Why? Yes I can. There are a lot of people who are ahead of you in the line. "
I : " Oh you actually mean I wait my turn" I smiled. ( Anyway not my first time embarrassing myself,kinda used to it now ).
I : " What are you doing here? If I may ask "
He: " Sure, you may " and he kept quiet.
I : " No no, it's not one of those questions that I want to ask, I'm just making small talk".
(I thought I heard him say 'Oh God' but he denied).
He: " I'm busy, just doing my job. It's March and I have too much on my plate to complete before the year end".
I : " Why do you keep it till the end then?"
(He shook his head in dismay).
He: " It's not me, it's you people who keep things till the end and then send out for me all at once. Sometimes each one of you call me 100 times a minute. I've failed to make you understand how the system works if they over load me. There's this one boy who fell asleep in the exam hall till it was time for the last bell and then woke up all of a sudden. He kept on calling me a million times but what could I do , you tell me?"
I : I ??...hmmm ,errr...
He: " Ohh, get over, it was a moot question. If only any of you had an answer to that..." He sighed.
I decided to lift his spirits (???!!!) and tried the God-gifted (!) humor on him.
I : " I can share your load that is if you let me. I know how to do it. I must have watched Jim Carry a million times."
He looked at me in disbelief and spoke slowly " Milady, no, I haven't bestowed any amount of humor on you, please don't try too hard and for God sake , don't exaggerate by saying 'a million times'".
I must have looked flushed but I still tried damage control by trying my luck again. " But you used 'a million times' when you were referring to that student in the exam hall." and I winked ( My God, I did. Couldn't I control my eye lids?)
He : " I can say anything I want. Milady, let me remind you, it works one-way only and I'm not Krishna though it was one of my past lives, so please don't wink at me. I may not mind but people easily take offense for doing it to the Gods. So please beware."
I murmured " That God Almighty was much cooler "
He: " Yes, that's because it's Morgan and he can afford to be cool when he's only pretending to be me but I can't because I have real responsibilities."
I : " Ok, Mr.God. Now show me some magic atleast. I have heard so much about all such stuff."
Just when I was done saying those words, the elevator stopped. I was gay with joy. I looked at him clapping, "Yayyyyyym you did it".
He scratched one of his heads " No milady, that would be ,what you people call , load shedding and by the way, you guys make Morgan Freeman walk on the water but when it comes to real me, you expect an elevator magic?! "
I : " Well then , show me your Viswaroopam? "
He: " You must be kidding. That will run into copy right issues. Watch it when it releases officially ".
I pouted for a minute before asking him one last question.
I :" Why do you look so indianized?"
He: "If I didn't then you people will call me an outsider and give a run for my life. So when you are in Rome, be a Roman. Right? "
I : " Can I learn some of the things you do?"
He: " What I do is for trained professionals only, don't try this at home or anywhere else. And by the way, don't you already have enough on your plate?"
That's all I saw before I woke up to my baby crying.
I : " Oh my God, it's you "
He: " Yes, it is me , milady"
I : " Oh God, there are a lot of things I want to ask you but I'm still looking for words. I'm tongue tied. Oh wait, is that you ?"He: " No milady, you are actually tongue tied, I'm not doing anything of that sort. But if you want to ask something, take a number and wait in the line."
I : " Oh c'mon, you can't possibly say that".
He: " Why? Yes I can. There are a lot of people who are ahead of you in the line. "
I : " Oh you actually mean I wait my turn" I smiled. ( Anyway not my first time embarrassing myself,kinda used to it now ).
I : " What are you doing here? If I may ask "
He: " Sure, you may " and he kept quiet.
I : " No no, it's not one of those questions that I want to ask, I'm just making small talk".
(I thought I heard him say 'Oh God' but he denied).
He: " I'm busy, just doing my job. It's March and I have too much on my plate to complete before the year end".
I : " Why do you keep it till the end then?"
(He shook his head in dismay).
He: " It's not me, it's you people who keep things till the end and then send out for me all at once. Sometimes each one of you call me 100 times a minute. I've failed to make you understand how the system works if they over load me. There's this one boy who fell asleep in the exam hall till it was time for the last bell and then woke up all of a sudden. He kept on calling me a million times but what could I do , you tell me?"
I : I ??...hmmm ,errr...
He: " Ohh, get over, it was a moot question. If only any of you had an answer to that..." He sighed.
I decided to lift his spirits (???!!!) and tried the God-gifted (!) humor on him.
I : " I can share your load that is if you let me. I know how to do it. I must have watched Jim Carry a million times."
He looked at me in disbelief and spoke slowly " Milady, no, I haven't bestowed any amount of humor on you, please don't try too hard and for God sake , don't exaggerate by saying 'a million times'".I must have looked flushed but I still tried damage control by trying my luck again. " But you used 'a million times' when you were referring to that student in the exam hall." and I winked ( My God, I did. Couldn't I control my eye lids?)
He : " I can say anything I want. Milady, let me remind you, it works one-way only and I'm not Krishna though it was one of my past lives, so please don't wink at me. I may not mind but people easily take offense for doing it to the Gods. So please beware."
I murmured " That God Almighty was much cooler "
He: " Yes, that's because it's Morgan and he can afford to be cool when he's only pretending to be me but I can't because I have real responsibilities."
I : " Ok, Mr.God. Now show me some magic atleast. I have heard so much about all such stuff."
Just when I was done saying those words, the elevator stopped. I was gay with joy. I looked at him clapping, "Yayyyyyym you did it".
He scratched one of his heads " No milady, that would be ,what you people call , load shedding and by the way, you guys make Morgan Freeman walk on the water but when it comes to real me, you expect an elevator magic?! "
I : " Well then , show me your Viswaroopam? "
He: " You must be kidding. That will run into copy right issues. Watch it when it releases officially ".
I pouted for a minute before asking him one last question.
I :" Why do you look so indianized?"
He: "If I didn't then you people will call me an outsider and give a run for my life. So when you are in Rome, be a Roman. Right? "
I : " Can I learn some of the things you do?"
He: " What I do is for trained professionals only, don't try this at home or anywhere else. And by the way, don't you already have enough on your plate?"
That's all I saw before I woke up to my baby crying.
